I'm currently listening to Travis. Their Invisible Band album is great for writing.
So why haven't I posted?
I've been feeling kinda down. I can blame stress, a crazy workload, a newborn son...
There is a real reason.
I haven't spent time with Jesus. My boss said it best, "You are starving yourself."
He is right. I have been spiritually starving myself. Prayer, praise, studying the word... these are ways to feed my soul. I haven't been doing any of these because I have been "too busy."
- - - - - - - - - - -
Sarah and I have always had a place that was ours. In our first house, we had a huge front porch with a swing. We would go sit on the swing, have a glass of wine and talk for hours. We read the Chronicles of Narnia to each other out there. We read devotionals huddled under a blanket in the fall.
When we moved to Venice, FL we made our living room into our special place. We got rid of the television. We bought a huge bookshelf to replace it. We opened the windows and read books while the ocean air blew in. We smiled and talked about how amazed we were that God had chosen to love us despite all of our junk.
Now we are in Santo Domingo. Our bedroom balcony looks out at the city lights downtown. Palm trees sway when the wind blows. A couple of plastic chairs and a metal table did the trick. I'm sitting on the balcony as I write this.
We have agreed to come out here every night. Even if it is just for ten minutes. We promised each other that we would spend this time together.
You see, this balcony, our living room, our front porch... these are all places where we get to relax. We get to talk. We listen to music. We talk about everything God is doing in and around us. This balcony is a place to read my bible without distractions.
I can sit here typing this blog post and feel happy.
This balcony represents something more than just a place to sit. I can sit in my bedroom. We even have a rather nice rocking chair in there. This plastic chair hurts my butt. I choose to sit here because this is where I told myself that I will always make time for my family. More importantly, I have told myself that I will always make time for Jesus. This is my temple.
Isn't that what a temple was intended to be? In the Old Testament the temple was a place to go to God. Sacrifices, tithes, offerings... were made at the temple. God never limited Himself to a small tent in the desert. That was just a place where the people could go to Him. God did this for them, not the other way around.
Think about it. Does God need your money? Does god need you to kill a goat? Nope! God gave us a way to feel forgiven. God gave us a way to be a part of the cool things He is doing.
The temple changed with the New Testament. The temple became a place to take communion. The temple was a place to remember Jesus and to praise God for His awesome gift.
The temple exists because we do not fully understand that God is everywhere. I'm admitting that I can't wrap my mind around it either. I built a humble temple on my balcony. When those moments come and I feel isolated from God, I can walk out on my balcony and sit with Jesus. The reality is that He never left my side.
I think we all need a temple.
Most Christians would claim that the church is their temple. If you are one of those people, then let me ask you this: Do you feel relaxed, at peace, loved... when you are in church? If you don't, then where do you feel this way. That place is your temple.
My dad once told me that he felt closer to God on a golf course than anywhere else. I can finally relate.
When you realize that you have a place like this, invite Jesus in. If you don't have a place like this, go make one. Don't starve your soul. Take the time to pray, sing, paint, read, play golf... whatever you need to do to feel loved and in Christ's presence. Acknowledge that it is only because of Jesus that you get to feel this way.
That is real worship.
4 comments:
This is gold, my friend.
Travis is a good band to help you get back in the groove of things.
Their music always sounds...right.
This leaves me very peaceful this evening. I just wish my friends were here to share that peace with me.
Love ya bro.
We all have our times in the desert... hopefully they have an absence-makes-the-heart-grow-fonder effect and are shorter rather than longer.
We actually had a discussion about something tangentially related in our Young Families group last weekend. The chapter we had read was about praying. And one of the points made was that the everyday 'stuff' we do, cooking, cleaning, etc. can be prayerful. At the time I was thinking along the lines of these are often 'mindless' tasks and you can use that time to actively engage in prayer (my cooking is often 'mindless' - let me tell you, not good). Then I realized that was not taking a sacramental view. We can in fact with praying with out thinking to ourselves "Dear Heavenly Father...." We pray with our entire beings and as such even the motion of folding laundry can be prayerful if done out of love because God is love.
Sometimes we just need to give ourselves a little break and realize that God did give us a lot of things to do on this earth, and He wants us to do them! Sometimes we are blessed with the opportunity to spend hours studying the Bible. Sometimes we are blessed with a screaming baby in the middle of the night. Sometimes our prayer is conscious and eloquent, some times it is rocking a baby, getting your hands dirty, and being too tired at the end of the day to string a coherent thought together.
Peace.
EXACTLY!
That is how we are supposed to live. I suck at it... so don't think I am Mr Spiritual. My worst moments usually include being stuck in traffic. What if I could turn those moments into times of prayer. Now my worst becomes a time to recharge.
That could go a long way to overhaul my life.
I think you missed the 'give ourselves a break' part of my comment ;). We need to realize that what is the 'right' way for us as young parents cannot be the same as what was 'right' for us when we didn't have children and probably won't be 'right' for us when our kids are older.
For example, my formal spiritual development (i.e., church) this morning had to contend with Jack blowing his nose in to my open hand, no tissue, and yelling 'baby car' repeatedly during the 2nd reading and Mara falling backward off the pew, hitting her head and elbow, and getting wedged in such a way that the man next to us has to help me pick her up so I could haul her (screaming) out of church as quickly as possible. Right now, I suppose I am supposed to be working on humility and gratitude :). Needless to say, this is a vastly different experience than before Ben and I had our two darling little, um, children.
Mother Theresa famously had very dry, maybe even dark, periods in her spiritual life, quite extended too. It isn't easy, even for the best of us, to live up that that 'Mr./Ms. Spiritual' title.
Just take a deep breath and try again tomorrow.
Post a Comment